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THE TRUTH ABOUT CATS
AND DOGS
What animals can teach us about relationships
by Coco Helado
An English artist from the early part of the century,
Louis Wain, used to create pictures of cats engaged in a
variety of human-like pursuits. One painting would show
several of them wearing top hats and playing a game of
cards; another would depict kitties attired in summery
dresses, as though preparing for a Sunday afternoon
picnic. Louis Wain eventually became quite mad, and his
works became increasingly bizarre. His felines took on
wild-eyed, maniacal expressions, and had vivid colors
and patterns emanating from their heads, like rock stars
in psychedelic-era concert posters. The artist
eventually died in a lunatic asylum, proving that
anthropomorphizing our pets is a dangerous pastime
indeed. Animals don't-and shouldn't-possess human
qualities; instead it is us who ought to try to become
more like our pets.
Yes, in the scheme of things, cats and dogs get little
respect. On the rare occasion that we humans do
acknowledge our animal natures, the animal in question
usually winds up with little respect, as proven by a
rundown of the pejorative terms we use: "Dumb
animal." "Brute." "Bitch."
"Dog." "Catty." But most people fail
to realize that our relationships with one another would
be much improved if we would only behave a little more
like cats and dogs! Cats and dogs can be wonderful
teachers, especially with regard to relationships.
For instance, women often complain to one another,
"Men are dogs." If only we were so lucky!
Ladies, we should pray that our men become as loyal and
selfless as canines. Do not malign this noble animal
with a negative comparison to your man. Instead,
encourage men to embody dog-like qualities.
To start with, dogs are honest. They don't hide their
feelings. They don't voice "harmless" little
lies or tell us they've been somewhere when they
haven't. We don't expect dogs to remember our birthdays
and anniversaries because we know from the start that
they are simply incapable of doing so. But we also know
that whenever there is a celebration, they will
enthusiastically join in the fun. And if ever they do
something wrong-and they will-they look guilty and beg
desperately for our forgiveness with such sad sweet eyes
we are compelled to reach down and give them a pat on
the head. One cannot hold a grudge against a dog.
But perhaps the most marvelous characteristic of dogs is
that they absolutely live to serve their mistresses.
Nothing makes them happier than making you happy. They
are eternally loyal, and their lives are given meaning
by ministering to others.
In fact, dogs make us remember what it is to be simply,
perfectly happy. They charm and enchant us, lifting our
spirits effortlessly. Walk down the street with a dog
and the most dour faces light up instantly. Even a few
minutes spent playing with a dog removes us from our
hectic routines and burdensome responsibilities and into
a world of joy, inspiring us to play like
children-without regard to the adult world's cutthroat
rules and competitiveness. Yes indeed-they say that dogs
are "man's best friend," but really, they are
women's!
Men, for their part, dismissively refer to women as
"felines" and deplore what they term
"catty behavior." A woman who succeeds in a
corporation is sometimes said to have "clawed her
way to the top." And then, of course, there's that
problematic term, "pussy," sometimes used
affectionately, but frequently deployed as slur.
But men should hold up cats as their feminine ideal.
Consider the facts: Men often complain that women can be
nagging and emotionally pushy. But cats are nothing if
not sensitive to emotional and physical boundaries. They
have the most carefully attuned sense of balance in all
things, making them the perfect household companions.
And cats have a certain keen intelligence that causes
you to feel they are one step ahead of you at every
turn.
Cats have a marvelous sense of discretion. They endure
the company of others until it is boring, and not one
second longer. It's not that they're snobbish, but they
make no bones about how they really feel. One could
never imagine a cat faking...anything!
Cats are never unpleasant, merely, at times,
uninterested. And why not? They don't suffer fools
gladly, preferring their own serene company to
second-class companionship and clumsy attempts at
affection. They are supremely secure beings who teach us
that striving for a little bit of solitude is natural
and desirable.
From a cat one learns grace, silence, and contentment.
When stroke a purring cat you nearly begin to purr
yourself! In fact, cats are incredibly tactile and
sensual. Rub a cat the right way and she will truly
appreciate your touch, stretching out and smiling to
show her pleasure.
So here it is: the truth about cats and dogs. If we
really did behave like them, perhaps the relations
between the sexes would be a lot smoother. While the
word on the street is that cats and dogs don't get
along, anyone who has ever lived with both knows it
isn't always the case. Cats and dogs can make the most
charming companions. Perhaps there is no sight sweeter
than that of the canine and feline sleeping together
with a tender, quiet affection.
How to learn the wise ways of animals? Have a pet! After
all, both having pets and having a partner offer similar
benefits. Studies show that people in either situation
tend to live longer, healthier lives. They keep us
active and give us a sense of pride. We want to walk
around with them and show them off! So the next time
someone looks at you with disdain and says, "You're
an animal," bow your head modestly and reply,
"Well, I try."
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