Silly Quotes - Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes
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Silly Quotes - Funny Quotes - Famous Quotes |
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 Welcome to our quotes page where you'll find silly quotes, classic funny quotations and famous heard around the world quotes! We have one of the largest archives of known quote archives by Hollywood celebrities on the World Wide Web! Tough Day? Need a laugh? We're happy to oblige! The itscupid jokes and humor archive is the largest of its kind, and is presented with no pesky pop up ads, redirect spam pages or browser spyware to muck up your puter! The world needs more laughter and we've compiled a fantastic array of
the best jokes and graphics that's ever circulated the Internet.
Single and Looking? For a quick one page comparison of the top 20 dating and singles sites, check out our compare popular dating sites chart. Should you prefer a quick loading and easy click graphics page with no text descriptions, click here for our quick click dating reference page. You can also access and read in depth reviews of every leading dating site on the all listed dating sites page. Famous Sayings and Quotes ArchiveNext Sayings and Quotes PageEvery morning is the dawn of a new error Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder Sign on baby's bib: SPIT HAPPENS I can see clearly now, the brain is gone... Mental Floss prevents Moral Decay Look out for #1. Don't step in #2 either Copywight 1994 Elmer Fudd. All wights wesewved Dain bramaged Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster Access denied--nah nah na nah nah! Ethernet (n): something used to catch the etherbunny Beware of programmers who carry screwdriver OUT TO LUNCH: IF NOT BACK BY FIVE, OUT FOR DINNER ALSO
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK) A Laundromat: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHING WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT All your base are belong to us May the smile on your face Come straight from your heart Never forget what a man says to you when he is angry Maybe this world is another planet's hell A friend is someone who is there for you when he'd rather be somewhere else Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans Most good judgement comes from experience. Most experience comes from bad judgement. You can't cheat an honest man One slip, and down the hole we fall It seems to take no time at all Does the noise in my head bother you? I know a million ways To always pick the wrong thing to say I must be an acrobat To talk like this and act like that Every rose has its thorn. Sister Luck is screaming somebody else's name It's no secret that a friend is someone who lets you help It's no secret that a liar won't believe in anyone elser I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound as they fly by." - Douglas Adams. "Unus, sed leo!" [One, but a lion!] - Aisopos (Fabulae 194). "»Stay« is a charming word in a friend's vocabulary." - Bronson Allcott. "Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and years of training can, using only their hands and feet, make some of the worst movies in the history of the world." - Dave Barry.
- M. Berle. "Too bad all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair." - George Burns. "An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less." - Nicholas Murray Butler. "Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake." - W.C. Fields. "When rats leave a sinking ship, where exactly do they think they're going?" - Douglas Gauck. "If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars." - J.P. Getty. "When authorities warn you of the sinfulness of sex, there is an important lesson to be learned. Do not have sex with the authorities." - Matt Groening. "I'm gonna live forever, or die trying." - Joseph Heller (Catch 22). "Girls are like pianos. When they're not upright, they're grand." - Benny Hill. "Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men." - Kin Hubbard. "Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law." - Hubert Humphrey. "Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you." - Carl Gustav Jung. "I dress up for weddings, funerals and fine steakhouses." --Dan Daly . "Clean laundry helps the confidence level, which helps the self image, which helps um, you win games, which makes you rich, which leads to greed, which leads to more money!!!, Which causes immense spending, which then triggers high anxiety, which causes a heart attack at the age of 31 and puts you in a coma for 10 years while you lose all of your money and you start at the beginning again!" --Benjer Petersen "If it's about computers... it can wait!" --Rachel Halladay "Don't spend your life as a pretty bitch... God will send you back nice and ugly!" --Fritz Next Sayings and Quotes Page Top of Page | Main Humor Archives |
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